The Cost of Social Media On Our Mental Health
To Step Away or Not To Step Away: The Cost of Social Media On Our Mental Health
Technology is advancing rapidly, and the online web is an endless vortex that one spends countless hours on. In 2021 the top 5 most popular apps in the United States were Facebook, YouTube, WhatsApp, Messenger, and Instagram (Ang, 2021). While getting a bad reputation at times, these apps do have their benefits. These various platforms allow us to feel connected to people whom we may not otherwise talk to; they give people access to a plethora of information by being able to search your favorite artist, psychologist, doctor, author, etc.; they provide us with information, so we keep up to date on the social or political climate, or they give us space to express ourselves or share our skills and talents. In some ways, these platforms can function somewhat like a journal, a visual resume, a space to teach/educate, or it may be a way just simply to brag about how awesome your life is going! While sometimes social media can be engaged in with intention and mindfulness, another benefit is that it gives a person a passive way to see what's going on in the world around them as they de-stress, kill time, or distract themselves during a difficult situation.
The shadow side of social media
Have you ever found yourself reaching for your phone and going on your top social media apps without conscious awareness? As your subconscious mind already knows where those apps are on your phone and your fingers go straight to it without intentional thought. Have you ever noticed 30+ minutes go by and you realized you got sucked into the vortex without even realizing it? Those darn algorithms do an excellent job at keeping us engaged in whatever content they want us to see. These algorithms know what content you tend to search for or click on, so they continue to feed you that content. They even track the time spent hovering over a particular type of content and use that to determine the content you wish you see more of. These algorithms will continue to feed you the content we consume, for better or for worse, which is why these apps have the potential to result in suffering mental health. Here are some ways social media can impact mental health:
Shame, Envy, Jealousy, Anger, Hate: These emotions can spike quickly depending on our personal vulnerabilities, unresolved issues in combination with the content we consume. Shame often comes as a result of feeling left out or having the experience of being “othered” by the majority culture (Let's be honest, shame or cancel culture is at an all-time high right now). Envy or Jealousy surface if someone falls into comparison mode when they see other people having what they don't have (whether it be this person has a body type they wish they had, someone has more money, they have a happier family, they get to have more fun adventures, etc.). Anger and Hate surface when we continue to see information that highlights people's opposing views that we may consider invalid, not based on facts, or result from plain naivety.
The igniting of emotions one may otherwise not have experienced in a day. We've been there – we were having a fairly good day, but we get on social media and we see a discouraging post. Suddenly our mood shifts and we are experiencing an unproductive emotion that we may not have otherwise felt if we hadn't gone on social media.
Social media is not the truest form of connection and authenticity, leaving us feeling more disconnected from our relationships. In addition, social media can be a platform for authentic, deep conversation. However, it is often challenging to engage in those types of discussions since the conversations are not always happening in real-time, and distractions can be all around us when having these conversations.
There can be a subtle (or not so subtle) pressure to capture a given moment because it would be good or fun content for our social media platforms. This robs our ability to be truly present in the moment. An added layer to this is that spending the time + energy to capture the perfect moment can distract us from the people whom we are with at that given time.
To an extent, heavy engagement in social media has the potential to impact one's developmental process and can arrest someone from learning social skills to engage with real-life people! This may be especially true for younger generations who have had less exposure to in-person relationships and conversations.
Benefits of Taking a Break From Social Media
I think most people can agree that the United States (and the World for that matter) as a whole is suffering with mental health. Given the social-political climate + Covid, we are all experiencing challenges in our own unique ways. Many people have started to consider breaking away from social media temporarily (or permanently) to help minimize a portion of stress or unproductive emotions they feel from being on it. However, the reality is that there are very few things in life that are all-good or all-bad. As mentioned before, social media has a lot of benefits, which is why it can be hard to make the decision to step away. Some people may fear taking the step of removing themselves from social media will result in more disconnection (feeling as if the only connections they have are online). Others may find that uncomfortable emotions may surface without the constant distraction of social media, without even realizing that their social media engagement functioned as emotional avoidance. Some people may experience “FOMO” (fear-of-missing-out) if they step off social media because they no longer will know what other people are doing with their lives. These are all valid reasons for being hesitant to walk away. To make the decision whether or not to step away, one may consider the short-term and long-term benefits and consequences of removing themselves from social media.
So Why Step Away From Social Media?
To give yourself an opportunity (actual time and emotional capacity) to create in-person, real connections without the screen functioning as a block to form authentic relationships.
To give yourself more time to tend to the things in your life that are life-giving (whether this is time with friends or family, time spent on your hobbies or learning something new, time completing tasks that you have been putting off, etc.)
To release yourself from the pressure to capture the perfect social-media moment.
To release yourself from the unproductive emotions that surface when you're on social media. Let's face it! We spend enough energy in any given day experiencing challenging emotions that surface as a result of our in-person lives anyway. The last thing we need is to add to this because there was a post that riled us up.
How Can I Be Successful With Stepping Away From Social Media?
Cognitive Scripts: These are the patterns of our lives that our brain remembers and do automatically to help us conserve energy (such as turning off the coffee pot, unplugging your curling iron, or driving yourself to work). In a way, automatically picking up your phone to click on your social media apps is a cognitive script your brain has imprinted. Awareness that this cognitive script exists will help you understand the natural impulse you may have to reach for your phone and check your favorite apps. The great thing about our brain is that it can learn NEW cognitive scripts and old cognitive scripts can fade away if we don't engage in them. So create yourself a new cognitive script. Make a plan. Every time you go to check your social media apps, immediately let your finger touch on something different such as maybe your podcast list, your audiobooks, or photo album. Perhaps you automatically move your fingers off the phone altogether and reach for something else like a real book, or a task around the house that needs to get done.
The Reward Center: The reward center of our brain is highly activated on our social media apps. When we do something pleasurable, the brain releases chemicals that say two things: “I like this” and “remember this so you can do it again in the future”. The downside of an activated reward center is that it builds tolerance toward these happy chemicals to the point where anything “less” rewarding does not quite satisfy us. Consider someone who used to love skateboarding but eventually they fall into drug addiction. Will this person find skateboarding pleasurable anymore? Probably not as much since their drug of choice is much more rewarding. When this person eventually decides to become sober, their brain will struggle for a while because doing things they used to enjoy (skateboarding) will seem blaze and under stimulating. A similar experience may occur when stepping away from social media. Just knowing that your brain will not be as stimulated for a while may help you feel less discouraged about that experience. Another positive thing about our brain, however, is that our brain is able to heal and rewire itself so that things that were once pleasurable but no longer are, will become pleasurable again. So consistency is key here. When stepping away from social media, it is important to engage in things that naturally reinforce the reward center, such as engaging in your hobbies, connecting with people, exercising, etc. While these things may not feel rewarding at first, eventually they will become rewarding to the brain.
Commit to being off the social media for a period of time. The difference between following through and not following through is making the commitment to follow through. Telling yourself “I might do this for a while but not sure for how long” decreases your likelihood of being successful. Committing for a set period of time to be off of it increases your likelihood that you will follow through.
Let yourself explore the function of your social media usage so you have a better understanding of why you do it in the first place. Perhaps you find that your social media usage is virtuous – it allows you to connect with others, show meaningful content to people, or it's a platform where you learn things. Or you may find that it functions as avoidance to emotion or facing your current life challenges, or it gives you a platform to make life look different than it really is.
Let yourself work through any emotions that may come up as a result of not being on social media. It's not so much that being off social media will create emotions – but rather, emotions that may have been overlooked due to being distracted on social media may surface. Perhaps you process these emotions with a friend, with a counselor, or through other means like journaling, yoga, meditation, etc.
Whether a decision is made to get off social media now, never, or in the future, my hope is that some of these considerations will help you make the most effective decision for yourself!
-Katie K LMHC, MHP, SUDP
Resource:
Ang, C. (2021, December 6). https://www.visualcapitalist.com/ranked-social-networks-worldwide-by-users/. Ranked: The World’s Most Popular Social Networks, and Who Owns Them. Retrieved December 21, 2021, from https://www.visualcapitalist.com/ranked-social-networks-worldwide-by-users/